Cold Beers: ON ICE!
While home over Christmas, when I was outside at a brewery in 20 degree weather shivering under a heater that was ineffective against the blustering winds of winder, the bartender who delivered a beer to me mused “I guess you dont have to worry about your beer getting warm!”.
We, your girls, have striven to embody the scandinavian concept of “friluftsliv” , aka the joy of the outdoors, despite the restrictions of FRIGID FUCKING TEMPERATURES and in that spirit I embarked on a great northern journey to fully pay tribute to the traditions of the viking ancestors. (we’re not scandanavian even a lil bit but viking culture speaks to me ok)
In short: ya girl wanted to get drunk on ice.
AND BOY DID I
This may be wild to imagine but these cold beers were not your average cold beer!!!!! Surrounded by CARS ON THE ICE and a LITERAL FIRE PIT ON THE ICE me and my Beer Fest Partner In Crime (not katrina, for once) drank beers that were MOSTLY OVER 6% ABV (that’s that shit I do like) that had turned to slush MINUTES AFTER OPENING (beer slushy!!!!!!! this is my DREAM!!!!)
Let me back up.
I started my day with an Oatmeal Espresso Stout (thanks to our local homies Two Roads) at a bar (where I have a punch card, its a whole thing, but needless to say I rarely visit this bar in the winter and I never, repeat NEVER IN MY LIFE, have wanted or will want a Stout when it is above 48 degrees outside). Stouts are winter beers baby!!! And I know what you’re thinking: I don’t like stouts. They’re “too heavy”. Guinness (the only non vegan beer) is “gross”. Well tough cookies! Not all stouts are created equal, but two roads is solid without being too heavy and almost creamy but not in a gross way (also- milk stouts are normally pretty delish, but I digress). Anyways, that was my breakfast!!!!!
After a filling first meal of 2 stouts, (I know you know I am alive because I am now reporting this, but truly it is a miracle I survived the day) we headed to the ICE aka this big ass lake that like fully freezes over in the winter time (which is wild because I swam in this lake in like…late september! now she is covered in like 18inches of ice!!!), which you should be impressed by because it is fucking cool. If you do not get excited about ponds freezing, that is fine. What’s a pond! But a LAKE!? Wild. Ok anyway the beers, as I mentioned, were very cold. Slushy! And they were leauxcal, which we love. If you see Saphouse mead in your liquor store or Schilling beer in your bodega (it’s there! I’ve seen it!!!!), hop on that dang train. If you see a frozen pond (one preferably that other people are already on because we don’t want you testing ice out yourself), hop on that bitch! We cannot recommend outdoor winter beer drinking enough. 10/10 for the experience, 0/10 for the hangxiety I experienced waking up the next morning.
We’ll be back with more beer takes soon (it’s hard to us to find pints when we do not leave our homes) but until then I encourage to live life with the confidence of the white man who asked me if I had “ever tried allagash”. Cheers!
I do not look great here but keep in mind this is 8 beers deep and I have approximately 12 layers on. Not kidding, I wore 5 pants.
