FIFA Women’s World Cup Part 3: Groups E-H
Alright everyone we have reached the HOME STRETCH of your reading and there is a lot of star power in the groups below (including most of the title favorites and our hometown heroes).
Jump to Group H
GROUP E
United States aka the Stars & Stripes
USA USA USA USA USA USA USA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ok now LADIES let’s get nice and loud to welcome the TWO TIME REIGNING WORLD CHAMPIONS put some RESPECT ON OUR NAMES BABY!! The heavy heavy favorite to win it all, our home nation is back and they are as strong a threat as ever. Though many crowd faves are now veterans, in the sunset age of their careers, we have a lot of young upstarts that are definitely going to be names to know this tournament and for years to come. I am not always one to be patriotic, but when it comes to these bitches y’all know I BLEED RED WHITE AND BLUE baby these colors DON’T RUN fuck YES america! Now, the haters will tell you that the USA fell off a little bit in recent years, and a we are reluctant to agree but it’s true that our Olympic performance was…lacking to say the least, but as the team moves on from the Jill Ellis (mixed feelings about this gal) era under newer coach Vlato Adonovski, they are going to need to capitalize on the diversity of this squad and the flexibility of their players. Fitness is a big concern- Captain Becky Sauerbrunn is out of the cup with injury leaving us weaker than usual in the typically solid centerback position, Alyssa Naeher retruns in goal but has been underperforming, and, for a team trying to make history to be the first ever country to win three consecutive titles, the challenges are mounting. But this isn’t just ANY team… IT IS AMERICA BABY and I don’t doubt them a bit.
Key Players: I mean, literally everyone. Veteran Megan Rapinoe will be a super sub and a leader in the lockerroom, the literally perfect and incredible Rose Lavelle will be ALL over the field, and crowd favorites the beautiful Alex Morgan, Julie Ertz, and Crystal Dunn all make returns as well. New faces: Alyssa Thompson, the youngest player to enter the NWSL draft who plays for Angel City FC, Trinity Rodman, an absolute POWERhouse forward, and the terrifying and dangerous Sophia Smith all will be at the front of the US line up and will look to make their tournament debuts in style…with hopefully lots of goals.
Netherlands aka the Oranje Leeuwinnen (this means the orange lionesses but i like that it looks like #WINNING)
You may remember the gals in Orange from the last world cup, where they made it all the way to the final (and lost to a little known cinderella team known as ‘MURICA), but they had a rough showing at the Euros following that performance and had to do some soul searching as of late. Like some other teams, they have a golden generation of talent, but haven’t quite cracked how to use all the weapons in their belt. Coach Andries Jonker is attempting to revitalize the team by switching to a 5-3-2 formation (a very big change for this traditionally 4-3-3 team) and relying on strong wingbacks to deliver, all while being a load management king and using international breaks to rest key players and capitalize upon fitness. Except for a notable injury to star player and standout from the last cup, Vivianne Miedema (who is out of the tournament), this is a VERY fit squad (and they’re in good shape too).
Key Players: In Vivi’s absence, Jill Roord (Man City) has emerged as a breakout star of this team. She’s joined with Esmee Brugts & veteran Lieke Martens as ones to watch in orange.
Portugal aka A Selecção das Quinas (this language is so wild smh. I guess this refers to the five shields on their flag/badge idk man)
While their men’s side had their peak era in the mid 2000’s, porto’s ladies have only really arrived on the international scene in the last five years, and many of their players grew up playing on boys teams to due a lack of opportunities for young women. Though missing an extensive history, they come into the tourney off of a FIRE qualifying campaign, where they blazed through opponents and capped it off with a shootout thriller of a win. This is a tough group for them to get out of for sure, but this is a very close knit team and they are definitely going to try to use that collective spirit to inspire some upsets.
Key Players: Tatiana Pinto is a veteran and a leader, Jessica Silva is a young star and their top scorer who is making her debut (why every time I type that I feel like I am writing a Playbill Bio lol)
Vietnam aka the Golden Star Women Warriors
No matter what happens to this team, they can leave the tournament knowing one thing, and that is that they have the greatest nickname of the field for SURE. Again, this is a tough group, so that may be the only win they get, but it’s something! These WOMEN WARRIORS are part of the #justhappytobehere crew, not quite at the level they need to be to compete with the international standouts they’ll be up against (it’s giving Thailand at the 2019 world cup… here’s hoping the USA doesn’t beat them 13-0 because that was hard to watch)-- even their coach Mai Duc Chung said they’re here to “learn from the other teams: and like ok I love that! It’s not a failure it’s a LEARNING experience!
Key Players: Speedy wingers Tuyet Dung and Thanh Nha, agile striker Huynh Nhu
GROUP PREDICTIONS: Barring a world shattering upset, the USA and Netherlands should be safe to get out of this group. Their rematch of the 2019 final will be the game to watch and determine the group winner, we, of course, will be backing the red white and blue.
GROUP F
FRANCE aka Les Bleues -
ALLEZZZZZZZ !!! Though of course I support USA here (unlike for men’s stuff where i’m like idaf about you people allons enfants de la patriEEEeh le jour de gloire EST arrivé!!!), these Bleu-ties (tehe) have half my heart. They’ve been here before and they just keep getting better with each edition: last Cup (played on home turf), they met the US in the quarterfinals (never have I felt such internal conflict and such tension!!! I wore both jerseys!) but lost. At the time, they were still under controversial coach Corinne Diacre, who was apparently “terrible” to work with, pushing many key players to withdraw from international play, including star Wendie Renard (more shortly). Corinne was let go and replaced with none other than HERVE RENARD who the astute among you might remember from the MEN’s cup, where he coached Saudi Arabia (who shocked the world with their win over future champs Argentina). A bit of a journeyman coach, he’s been all over (usually followed by success tbh) and is excited to be back home in France. Though he just took over in April, Renard has stated that he prioritizes up tempo play and pressing, which will be a good fit for this team. Also, his name (and Wendie’s) mean fox…. France is usually a rooster mascot… fox in the HENHOUSE????
Key Players: Aforementioned captain Wendie Renard is a defensive showstopper who can also score, and she’s like a bajillion feet tall. Eugenie Le Sommer (forward) is returning as the leading all time goal scorer, and of course we have Pauline Peyraud Magnin as a cool and collected presence in goal. Keep in mind France has one of the best European club leagues so any ladies that play there (lots of the team)will have good experience!
First match : July 23 vs Jamaica 8pm Australia time
JAMAICA aka THE REGGAE GIRLZZZZZZ
Well, like another famous Jamaican group, against all odds, the Girlz made it to a huge international competition(yes I am of course referring to Cool Runnings, core memory). This team has had a rocky road (at one point in the early 2000s they were just straight up disbanded) and had to crowdfund their way here, but they did it!! New/ old coach Lorne Donaldson (got fired in 2020 and rehired?) has been experimenting with various formations, with middling success, but you cannot deny the talent is there. And they have the heart! Honestly a feel good story all around but they have a tough go of it in this group.
Key Players: Forward Khadija Shaw aka Bunny, the soul of this team, she once had to convince her parents to let her play because they saw no future in women’s football.After a US collegiate career, a stint at Bordeaux, and current club play at City, Bunny is hoppin her way to the top now! Drew Spence, midfield, switched her affiliation to Jamaica in 2021 (take that colonialism) and is a good all-around player
First match : July 23 vs France 8 pm OZ time
BRAZIL aka A Seleçao like the men, the Selection
Now, men’s success does not always correlate to a good women’s team, sadly (in the US it’s the reverse lol) but here we can safely say, there is a reason Brazil is synonymous with soccer. They are one of the few teams that has appeared in every cup since the beginning, and they always have talent and potential…. But their best finish to date has been 4th. SO THEY READY FOR IT. They’ve been coached by Swede PIa Sundehede for the past 4 years and are fresh off a 2022 Copa America win.- they really want it this time (and it could be the last for their star Marta!!)
Key Players: MARTAAAAAA possibly the MOST famous women’s soccer player outside the US, at 37, Marta may not be starting but her presence alone (and signature red lipstick, girl yes!) can lift this team all the way up, Rafaelle (yes they have one name or rather they have 7 names) is a defender with versatility who has been featured in various postions on the squad, and is likely captain if Marta doesn’t start, and Debhina (forward) the top scorer under coach Pia First match : July 24 vs Panama
PANAMA aka las Canalarias because they’re by a canal I guess? Lol??
Another first timer, these ladies got in thanks to a playoff tournament (idk this was a thing they did this year, we’re ignoring it).They are fresh off some wins and feeling themselves!! The bad news is this is a VERY tough group for a first Cup, so methinks they may be here for a good time, not a long time. We do stan Coach Nacho (!) Quintana, originally from Mexico, arriving from recently coaching the Nicaragua women’s team, because he was a key force in ensuring equal pay for these women and in creating a countrywide development program for women’s soccer. Feminist icon!!
Key Players : Marta Cox,midfielder, who started playing internationally at the senior level at 14 - she’s got 10 years of experience and she’s 25 lol. Co-midfielder and team captain Natalia Mills has previously thought about retiring, but the beautiful game drew her back in.
First match : July 24 vs BRazil
GROUP PREDICTIONS: France is a huge favorite to lead the group, with Brazil coming in second, but the Reggae Girlz did not come this far to back down without a fight. It’s gonna be a challenge for Panama to break in there sadly.
GROUP G
Argentina aka the Albiceleste (White & Sky Blues)
Living in the Shadow of their men’s team (who btw just won the world cup a mere seven months ago), the Albiceleste have struggled for recognition and development. As recent as 2016 the team was on a hiatus (it “effectively didn’t exist” that year? Like they just didn’t do it? Kinda rude). They’ve been to four world cups but have never made it out of the group, but had their best result to date back in 2019 (two draws…still not great). They really shine in their midfield, which is full of players with high football IQs who are excellent at driving the ball forward. The other two parts though… are not as great. The defense tends to have trouble holding the line, and if (when) a ball gets behind them they don’t recover well. Their forward line has talent, but needs to be more clinical and really take advantage of opportunities if they want to score goals here.
Key Players: Mariana Larroquette (Orlando Pride) is probably the best known argentinian player, but Yamila Rodriguez is their main striker. Special shoutout to Miriam MAyorga who somehow found the time to…become a doctor? As well as a professional footballer? Get you a girl who can do both.
Italy aka the Azzurri
This team is a bit of a wildcard right now- though they come into the cup ranked 16th in the world, they’re in a period of transition it seems, and manager Milena Bertolini (like the sauce?) made some CONTROVERSIAL choices in terms of call ups. You won’t see Aurora “Yaya” Galli, who was a pillar of the team when they reached the semifinals last time around, or legend and former captain Sarah Gama. Also excluded: Valentina Bergamaschi and Martina Piermonte, which Bertolini claims is based off technical, tactical and physical decisions. She instead has opted for a younger and more moldable team, but will that lack of experience come back to bite them? They’ll have to figure out how to score and rediscover some of that magi from 2019 to succeed.
Key Players: 16 (!!) year old Giulia Dragoni, Chiara Beccari are teens and the future of the team. Leaders Manuela Giugliano, Cristina Girelli will look to stabilize this ship. Also, defender Lisa Boattin isn’t necessarily a STAR but she is dating Swedish player (and juventus teammate) Linda Sembrant, and I am hype to watch them play one another. (Another international love story to follow: Sportsmanship queens Sam Kerr and Kristie Mewis)
South Africa aka Banyana Banyana (wow ok fun to say! It just means the girls but! fun!)
Ok coming fresh off their strike and resolving a dispute with their FA, the team received a “humble donation” to make up for the pay they were protesting-- seems sus but we respect them getting their bag! Wish it had been in a more reasonable way but! It is what it is. This team def deserves the respect, especially after winning AFCON (africa cup of nations) for the first time and becoming more professional and experienced since the last cup. Coach Desiree Ellis will focus on speed and the counterattack to drive this team ahead.
Key Players: Midfielder Linda Motlhalo and Refiloe Jane are the core of this squad.
Sweden aka Blågult (the blue & yellow)
Sweden is a powerhouse of women’s football- from their former rivalry with the USA (which has fallen off a bit now that we stopped stealing each other’s coaches) to their third place finish in 2019, expectations will be high for this team. They’ve had to learn some hard lessons though, especially at the euros, and many key players have been struggling with injuries. They are, objectively, one of the best teams in the world and their performance here should reflect that, but even if they make it out of this group (likely) they will face either the USA or the Netherlands in the round of 16 (rough)
Key Players: Veteran Caroline Seger remains questionable, Fridolino Rolfö (wild name) is an all time great and comes into this tourney off a Champion’s League title.
GROUP PREDICTIONS: This group is really a story of potential, with a lot of talent on these teams but perhaps not the strategic acumen to achieve success. If we’re being basic, it should be Italy and Sweden coming out, but we’d love to see South Africa convert their AFCON success to the global stage and will be rooting for them.
GROUP H
GERMANY aka DFB Frauenteam,ok sure
Similar to the men, these ladies dominate and have qualified for every Cup to date. They’ve won before in 2003 and then again in 2007; and when they didn’t win, still had pretty successful results as runners-up in 1995 and semi-final appearances in 2015. Most times when they WERE knocked out, it was by the eventual champion (except last time, when it was Sweden, who did come in 3rd). They were runners-up in last year’s Euro, and also qualified handily with 27 points in 10 matches (scoring 47 goals!). Their group match ups are versus very different squads, but the speed and pressure from this team tends to wear down any approach ( as is coach Martina Voss-Tecklenberg’s plan)
Key players : Germany is bringing back much of the squad from last time and from Euros, led by captain and striker Alexandra Popp; known for her dominance on the pitch, Merle Frohms in goal (Germany notoriously has a STACKED roster of goalkeepers); Lena Oberdorf (midfield), a rising star at 21
First match : July 24 vs Morocco @ 4:30am Eastern
MOROCCO aka the Atlas Lionesses
Another first timer, they are the first Arab team to play at the Cup (FIFA said this not me lol). I’m just going to point out, it’s clear what teams FIFA cares about because their page on the official website??? Not very well researched!!! Coach Reynald Pedros (a Frenchie) has balanced out this team with an iron-clad defense and an efficient attacking force, and most of all, he believes in them and has been said to “cultivate a fighting spirit”. Can these ladies harness the momentum of their men’s team to make a name for themselves in their first appearance??
Key players : Midfielder and captain Ghizlane Chebbak is the cornerstone of the team, daughter of a former national team player; Rosella Ayane (who could have also played for England OR Scotland) at forward, Nahla Nakkach (midfield) known for her passing precision
First match : July 24 vs Germany @4:30 AM eastern
COLOMBIA aka las Cafeteras aka las Chicas Superpoderosas
2022 Copa America hosts, they reached the final and lost to Brazil (which again, we can excuse them for). They not only showed that they are gracious hosts, but also demonstrated the depth of talent on the team; a credit to coach Nelson Abadia.. They’ve not made it past the group stage before, so this is the time to try. The only problem here? This group is a tough draw with no easy wins (and a variety of playing styles).
Key players: Forward Linda Caicedo, a living legend in the making who was called up to the national team at age 14; she currently plays for Real Madrid; Forward Catalina Usme, captain and all-time leading goalscorer in the Columbia pro league.
First game : July 24 vs Korea @ 10 pm Eastern
SOUTH KOREA aka the Taegeuk (that’s the flag symbol) Ladies
4th time here, but never had much success - last year they lost all their games, despite having youth squads with lots of talent. Previous coaches have claimed that the training in Korea has not been physically intensive enough, and players are lagging behind on the pitch, which has been echoed by current British Coach Colin Bell. He has been prioritizing intensity and trying to get this team up to international level.
Key Players: Ji Soyun, considered the best female Korean player in history); striker Kim Hyeri, full back Jang Selgi, and Cho Sohyun who plays for Tottenham (COYS)
GROUP PREDICTIONS: Germany seems to be the clear group winner barring any shocking upsets, and I’d say Colombia is a safe runner-up. HOWEVER Morocco does intrigue me, it’d be awesome if they could replicate the success of their men’s team!
